is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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