can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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