I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
