Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
