im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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