I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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