My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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