So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
