38 yer olds are good kisserssss
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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