They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I will pee on everything he values.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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