Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
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it glows. i had to have it.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
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Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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