we're chasing vodka with high fives
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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