So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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