You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
