There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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