His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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