In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I have post one night stand depression
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
