Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize