I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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