He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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