She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
