that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
