pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
