its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
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He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
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Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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