How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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