i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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