if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
