I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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