i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
