i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
