Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
