Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
