I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
