Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
