What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize