We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Randomize
