i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize