You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
