Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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