If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
