She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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