You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
