Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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