Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
