I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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