just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
