Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.