Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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