How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
