somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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