Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize